Suicidal Love
by lilmissangel22
Summary: Bella is in an abusive relationship with James, and she tries to kill herself, which lands her in a hospital for kids with suicide attempts. Edward is a "normal" teenage guy with a job that brings him to Bella...Only his job isn't to become friends with.
1. Chapter 1

**Bella POV**

I looked down into the water, felt the cool breeze on my face, and prepared for the jump. I was tired of being the helpless little girl all the time, and sick of being yelled at constantly. I looked up at the sky one last time, and I jumped…

"Isabella! Stay with us now. Ok? Don't close your eyes! Your gonna be fine! Isabella? Isabella!"

I heard everyone, but I couldn't find it in myself to respond to them. My eyes were heavy, and I couldn't keep them open any longer. Everything was sore…was I dead? I didn't think death could hurt this badly. Maybe I was in hell for everything I did to everyone…_Yes, your in hell Bella. Did you really believe that you would be in Heaven after everything you did? You're in hell and you deserve to be. Now close your eyes and deal with it. You brought this upon yourself. _My thoughts drowned out all the screaming and yelling I heard from everyone else. I closed my eyes, and finally became numb.

**James POV**

Bella is in the hospital. Again. _God. That girl is hopeless! _I thought to myself. Over the past 2 years that we've been together, she has been in the hospital probably over 100 times. I was starting to get tired of it.

"James, officer Swan would like to have a word with you." The doctor said to me. Again. 3rd time in the past 20 minutes. Don't they understand I don't want to talk to him? _Whatever, lets just get this over with. Not like I did anything wrong right?"_

Officer Swan walked into the room, a grim expression on his face. He looked pissed. _Great. This should be fun._

"James." he greeted me with a nod.

"Swan." I replied, just as icily.

"I'm guessing you already know why I'm here?" Officer Swan said. When I didn't reply, he continued. "I want you to tell me everything that happened last night. First of all, why did Bella jump?"

_How the hell am I supposed to know that? I don't know what the fuck that girl thinks. She's a crazy bitch. _"I don't know." I spat at him.

"She's your girlfriend. She's been your girlfriend for the past 2 years. I would think you of all people would know these things. Has she had stuff going on in her life lately? Anything that would cause her to do something like this?"

"I _told _you I don't know. If I knew, don't you think I would tell you? She's just crazy. That girl needs some serious help."

"Well she's not the only one that needs help, James. The doctors said that she has severe head trauma and possibly a couple broken ribs. And she is severely underweight. I'm sure you noticed that though."

"What do you mean underweight? She looks fine to me! Actually, she still looks like she could lose a couple pounds. And I don't know anything bout the head trauma or whatever the hell you just said. If you're implying that I'm abusing her, you're wrong. I haven't been anything but nice to Bella for the past 2 years. Maybe she fell down the stairs again or something. She's clumsy like that."

Officer Swan got a grim look on his face. "I don't believe you, James. But I guess I'll just have to take your word for it. I have no evidence of any kind of abuse, especially with her record here. But she will have to go away for a couple of weeks, maybe months, for a suicidal hospital down in Florida. You can say your goodbyes later. Good day, James." He left, without a second glance at me. "yeah. Good day…officer."

I picked up my phone and started dialing. When i heard the click on the other side, i started talking. "Jasper, It didn't work...again. I think i have a plan though. Meet me in the parking lot of the hospital. The usual spot." I hung up after that, without letting him say a word.

**Alice POV**

"baby, I'm meeting James in a couple minutes. Ok?"

I hated being woken up like this. "mmmmmmm...Jazz do you always have to wake me up like this? Can't you just stay?"

"I'm sorry baby, but no. Bella's in the hospital again. He needs me."

"ughhh. What'd she do this time?"

"Attempted suicide. What else? James really needs to get her some help. Poor girl..."

I didn't like the way he was talking about Bella. All 'poor girl. wish i could help her. i hope she doesn't kill herself.' and all. Stupid, pretty, sexy Bella. Urgh.

"Yeah, whatever. Just go before i change my mind. Hurry back."

"Don't i always?" He kissed my forehead, my cheek, my nose, then finally, my lips. "I love you baby. I'll be back in a little while."

"I love you too, Jazz."

He walked out of our room, and i listened while he opened the garage, started the car, and drove off. I hated when he left. Especially so early in the morning. _What should i do now? _I asked myself. I looked at the clock. 9:46 AM. Just then, my phone rang.

"Hello?" I said into the phone.

"Ally cat?" the person on the other end replied. I immediately sat up, making myself a little dizzy in the process.

"EDWARD!" I was relieved to hear his voice. "You're ok? When did you get back! Did it go ok? What all happened?" I was always scared when he left. I was one of the few people that knew what he actually did for a living.

"Woah woah woah alice. Chill out with the questions! Yes, im ok, I got back last night, It went perfectly, and what happened is all confidential."

"ughh. _confidential_. I hate when you say that. Can't you just tell me this _oneeee _time?

"Sorry, honey. Not this time. But how bout we meet at the coffee shop down the street from your house in a couple minutes? I miss that pretty little face of yours."

"Kay! Ill see you at...10:30?"

"Sounds good to me! See you then Ally cat."

"See you then Eddykins." I giggled. He hated when i called him that.

I hung up the phone and started getting ready. I looked through my closet trying to find something to wear. When i didn't find anything, i decided that i would steal one of Jazz's sweatshirts and throw on a pair of jeans. I opened his drawer and looked through, trying to find my favorite one. When i didn't find it, I just threw on a random one and started for the coffee shop.

**Edward POV**

I started down the road to the coffee shop me and Alice met at since...well, forever i guess. We've been best friends since we were born, and we tell each other everything. Or, in my case, everything that I was allowed to tell.

I turned the corner into the little alley that I had to go through before i got to the coffee shop. I started to walk really fast, hoping that I wouldn't run into Emmet, an asshole that always got on my last best nerve. I thought i was gonna be lucky today, but i guess my luck ran out.

"Well well well, lookie here. Where you goin copperhead?"

I swear I'm gonna kill him one of there days.

"None of your business, Emmet."

"You think you're so big and bad, dontcha copperhead?" Emmet sneered at me. "Well ill tellya somethin. You ain't! You're a gay dick sucker, that's what you are. You dick sucker."

I looked down at the floor and tried to calm myself down before I ripped his fucking head off. _His miserable little prick of a head. He doesn't have a clue what I could do to him if I let myself…Maybe I should let myself. Then he'll leave me the fuck alone…No Edward! He can't know what you do. You cant give yourself away. You wont be safe if you do….But whats one little person? FUCK! No Edward! Fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK!_

I clenched my fists together and gritted my teeth, forcing myself not to say or do anything, praying he would walk away soon.

"See, you don't even have it in you to look me in the eye. Your so pathetic, copperhead. I bet you've never even-" He stopped talking. I had finally looked up at him. "uhh…I..uh…gotta go." He ran off.

Well at least I know my "I'm gonna kill you" look still scares the shit outta everyone. I laughed. _Imagine how much it would scare them if they knew I was serious._

I finished the walk to the coffee shop_, _and found that Alice was already there.

"Alley cat?"

She jumped about 10 miles high when i said that. "Oh! Hey Edward. You scared me..."

"Whats up sweetheart?"

"Nothin much, how bout you?"

"ehh. same ol' same ol'"

"Kickin ass and takin names?"

"More like killin asses and crossing out names." Alice giggled.

Just then, my phone rang. It was my boss.

"Edward, listen. You have a very important assignment. A guy named James just called. Didn't give a last name. Said we wouldn't need it He wants a hitman to kill his girlfriend, and make it look accidental. He said not to ask any questions, and he has loads of cash. You up for it?"

_Aren't I always? _"tell me the deets, boss." I replied, smiling.

"I knew I could count on you. He's been trying to get her to kill herself for years now, and every time she has failed. But she has been trying. At the moment, she is in Jacksonville, Florida in a suicidal institute. You will have to get in there somehow, get her alone, and make her murder look like it was a suicide. Complex, but I know you can do it."

"No problem, boss. But whats the girls name?"

The phone clicked. _Oh well, guess i'll have to find out for myself._

"Allycat, i gotta go...It was my boss. New assignment."

"Don't get hurt. Ok?"

"Don't worry bout me darlin. I'll be fine. I'll call you asap ok?"

"kay..."

**Bella POV**

I woke up confused. _Where am I? I thought I was dead?..._I sat up and looked around. _Great. Another hospital._

I heard a knock at my door, and then a nurse walked in.

"Oh good! You're awake. We thought you were never going to wake up!" She was joking, but I also saw the little bit of truth behind her eyes.

"How long have I been out?"

"About 2 days, you were really bumped and bruised."

I looked around the room. It didn't look like a usual hospital...I wasn't hooked up to any kind of machines...

"Where am I? This doesn't look like a normal hospital..."

"oh uhm... It isn't a normal hospital. They transferred you here yesterday. This is a place for uh...people who the doctors believe attempted suicide, or stuff like that..."

"Im in a suicide hospital?"

"Now don't think of it like that...We're just here to help you with your problems. Now, relax and your first appointment with Doctor Cullen will be in an hour."

As the nurse walked out of the room, i realized that there were two beds. _I have a roomate? Great... This should be fun..._

Just then the door opened, and the most gorgeous boy i've ever seen in my life walked in.

"Hey, you must be my roommate...I'm Edward. I'm new here."


	2. Chapter 2

**Bella POV**

I looked at the boy that just walked into my room, _Edward. _I thought to myself. _what a perfect name._ He had bright green eyes and an amazing smile. He also had a somewhat copper colored hair, that was darker in some spots, and lighter in others. Like he had highlights, only they were obviously not highlights.

"Isabella?" he snapped me out of my daydream.

_Shit. He saw me staring…_ I immediately felt the blush coming to my face. I turned away quickly. "uh.. Yeah sorry. Kinda…zoned out I guess. Uhm.. And its Bella, not Isabella."

"Well Bella, would you like to join me for lunch?"

_Would I? Yes! Wait. What would James say? He would call it cheating. He would hurt me again. But I would deserve it, because it would be cheating wouldn't it? I cant have lunch with another guy when I have a boyfriend! …But he's so hot…And how would he find out? No Bella! Remember what happened last time you did something like this? _My hand automatically went to my wrist, where James snapped it in two and threatened to cut it off when I went out with one of my guy friends for a couple hours.

"uh…no thanks. I kind of want to settle in first and…" I trailed off.

"you have a boyfriend don't you?" He sounded…disappointed?

"uhh.. Yeah…He's really a great guy, so I don't want to uh.. Upset him… because he tends to have…anger issues…" I held my wrist close to me, praying that the memories would go away.

"Well ok, then how about I just stay in here with you. I have to unpack and everything also, so we can get to know each other while we unpack. Sound good?"I looked around the room, then realized I had nothing to unpack.

"I don't have anything with me though…"

"Its ok, I don't either."

"But you said unpa-"

"I know what I said. I just want to get to know you, and that's the only thing I thought of."

_God he's hot. Stop staring Bella, he's gonna think your some creep._

"mmkay…so uh…what do you wanna know?"

"How old are you?""17. And you?"

"18. When is your birthday?"

"November 7th"

"Mines December 5th. But can I ask you a personal question, Bella?"

"Yes, but im not promising to answer it.""Why are you here?"

_Should I tell him? He seems trustworthy…But what if he thinks I'm some helpless little girl, like everyone else thinks? So far, he's the only person that's been nice to me in forever…_I decided to take a chance.

"uh…attempted suicide…long story.. What about you?"

"uhm…I uh…" He stopped talking.

"you don't have to tell me if you don't want to, I mean, we don't exactly know each other."

_Oh gosh. Now he's gonna avoid me, so I don't ask him again. I just blew it. Damn it Bella! James is right, you do ruin everything._

"Attempted suicide, jumped off of a bridge. Family problems, relationship problems….I was just tired of everyone just walking all over me."

His reply really surprised me. I didn't expect him to tell me all of that already.

"I uh.. I have kind of the same reason. Except not family problems. My boyfriend ha-"

"EDWARD MASON PLEASE GO TO DOCTOR CULLENS ROOM IMMIDEATELY."

"I gotta go, Ill talk to you later ok?" He looked disappointed.

"okay…."

He got up, and started for the door.

"Oh and Bella?" He looked back at me.

"Yeah?"

"Im uh…Im really glad you didn't kill yourself. You seem really nice…"

I didn't get a chance to thank him, because by the time he was done talking, he was walking out of the room, and I was completely lost for words. _That's the first nice thing anyones said to me in forever…_

**Edward POV **

_Bella. Isabella. Isabella. Isabella. Bella…_I couldn't stop repeating her name in my head. _What is wrong with me? Stop it, Mason! You have a JOB to do. You cant get distracted. You're the best there is. You cant let some girl come in and ruin it all for you…_

I walked down the hallway to Doctor Cullens room and stopped at his door.

"Come on in, Edward." A soft voice said, before I even had time to knock.

"uh, doctor cullen?" I said cautiously.

"oh yes, allow me to introduce myself. I am the phycyatrist here, and I am going to be your 'doctor' for the next couple of weeks, months, or however long it is that you stay here."

_The things I do for my job…_

"Nice to meet you, doctor cullen. I'm Edward, as you already know." I decided to be as polite as possible, so maybe I'd get lucky and just be able to get my job done and leave."

_My job…_I thought. Could I really finish the job, If im already getting distracted? _Stop it, Mason. You have to kill the girl. You have to! If you don't you will lose your job. And she wanted to kill herself anyway! You'll just be…helping her out. Right?_

"Ahem…" Doctor Cullen cleared his throat.

"Oh! Sorry doctor Cullen, I was just thinking."

"What about, Edward?"

_Great, here he goes with the whole phycyatrist thing…Be polite Edward. Make up a story. Look around the room, there, on the wall, talk about the painting. _"Just about that painting over there. It looks really expensive… like it was really made in the mid- 1840's."

Doctor Cullen looked pleased. "Oh! You like art? Yes, this was handed down in my family, and yes, it is an original painting. I'm very happy to see that we have something in common, Edward. But it is almost time for lunch, so why don't you go on, and we will talk some more later?" I nodded and started for the door."Oh and Edward?" He stopped me.

"yes?"

"Watch your roommate, Isabella. We got a call from some guy named James saying that she always seems to find something that can be destructive to her health."

"No problem, Doctor Cullen."

"Carlisle, please."

"Carlisle." I turned and walked out of the room, before he had time to stop me.

_This job will be easy as pie._

Or…So I thought.

**James POV**

"Fuck. YES!" I yelled as I went into my house.

"Dude, I canNOT believe you hired a fucking hitman!" Jasper said behind me.

"Really, Jazz? What the fuck! She's a fucking BITCH. She needs to die. Asap. Im sick and tied of having her constantly whining about how she misses her friends and shit. Well if she misses them so _damn _badly, then why doesn't she leave me for them huh?"

"Because she was scared of you?" Jasper snapped at me. "You don't fucking hit girls, man. She was fucking terrified of you!"

I thought back on all the times I had hit, or hurt Bella. Yes, there were a lot, but she deserved it every single time.

"Listen fucker. Are you with me or against me? Because im pretty damn happy that I finally got rid of her. I've been trying to get her to kill herself for years. I would've done it myself if I knew there was no way for me to get in trouble."

"Well why'd you stay with her if you fucking hate her?"

"Because I didn't want to just leave her. I wanted her to leave this planet. I wanted nothing to do with her. I didn't want to run into her years later and see how much happier she is. She doesn't deserve to be happy. She's a slutty ass bitch, that just happens to be great at sex. that's the only reason I kept her around for so long. She sucks dick like no other. But now that she's refusing to fuck me, and I have to force her to half the time, Im tired of her."

"Wow James. Why would she want to do anything with you after all the shit you do to her?"

"Jasper, think of it this way. She does something I don't like, so I hit her. She does it again, I hit her harder, and push her into walls and shit. She doesn't it a third time and I lock her in the closet. No food, no water, or anything for a whole day. Then she doesn't do it anymore. So if I want her to fuck me, I do the same thing. So I get my way whenever I want. She'll do anything for me as long as she doesn't get locked in the closet. But lately, she hasn't cared about any of that, because she's been trying to kill herself anyway. So she's useless now, and I decided to be nice, and have someone else help her with the whole killing thing. So basically, im doing her a favor."

"Whatever, man. Its wrong and you know it."

"Look Jazz. You're my best friend and all, but if you're against me on this, then just get the fuck outta my house. Im fucking ecstatic now that I got rid of her for good. So you can either go get your bitch and meet me at the bar so we can party it up, or you can go back home to your bitch and lay around watching chick flicks all day. Your. Fucking. Choice."

Jasper got right in my face. _Right in my FUCKING face! _"Alice." he sneered. "Is NOT a bitch. Nobody calls her that. Im going home with her, and yes, if I have to watch a couple chick flicks than ok. I'd rather do that then be around a fucking murderer."

"Murderer? Fuck you, Jasper! The boss is your fucking friend!"

"Yes, but I thought you would want someone killed that did something wrong. Bella did nothing to you, or anyone else for that matter. And I suggest you don't say anything else to me, because I might just inform the police on your decision."

"Fuck you. Get out of my house you fucker."

"Gladly." He snapped, and walked out of the door, knocking over a couple chairs on the way.

_Fuck you. _I thought, over and over in my head. _I'll have fun by myself._

What was I thinking? By myself? Psshhhh. _Time to get some girls. _I smirked. And set out to find a couple lucky bitches to help me out.


	3. Chapter 3

**Bella POV**

"No. NO!" I screamed. "Please….Don't! Stop! STOP!"

James smacked me across my face. "Shut up, you bitch. I'm not stopping. You could've made it easier on yourself. But no, you had to be a bitch. So you need to be punished. Quit fucking moving!"

"James…Your hurting me. Stop!" He started to take my clothes off. "James no! I-I cant! I just…please stop!"

He didn't stop. In fact, every time I told him to stop he did something worse.

"Shut up you slut. You think you can go out with some other guy for a whole day, and then come back here and refuse to fuck me? Fucking skank. You should've known better. I thought I taught you to listen better than that."

_Taught? No, more like scared me into listening to you._

"James. Please, I'll do whatever you want. Just stop hurting me!"

"Too late now, _Bella._" He sneered my name. I didn't like hearing him say it like that. It meant that there were worse things coming if I didn't give him what he wanted.

_Here goes nothing…Oh God, please let this work…_

"James…." I said, as seductively as I could "I'll do _anything _you want. Let go of me first. I promise you, you wont regret it."

_Please work Please work Please work….I cant stand another beating from him. Please please please please…._

"hmm.. Anything?" It sounded like it was working…

"_Anything_."

"The one and only thing I want…." He started.

"_Yessss James?_"

"QUIT FUCKING MOVING SO I CAN FINISH!"

_Oh God. It didn't work…Oh God. Please. Let him calm down. Please…._

"OUCH! James! YOUR HURTING ME!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. It hurt. It really fucking hurt. And he wasn't stopping.

"FUCK Bella QUIT MOVING!"

"STOP!" I screamed. "Stop! Your hurting me! Please!"

"BELLA!" I heard him yell.

"Stop…." I whimpered.

"Bella, wake up! Please! Damnit Bella! Wake the fuck up!"

_That's not James' voice…._

"James….stop…"

"Bella. Listen to me. You need to wake up. Now."

"ouch…please stop…"

I felt hands grab my shoulders and shake me a little bit."Bella!"

I opened my eyes, and saw brilliant green eyes in front of me.

I had been dreaming the whole time. Except it wasn't a dream. It was a memory.

"Bella? God Bella! Are you ok? You just about gave me a heart attack!"_He was worried about me?_

"Edward…right?" I wasn't sure, I had only talked to him once…He nodded, so I continued. "I'm fine, don't worry. I just had a….uh…bad dream…"

"Bella, that sounded like more than a bad dream. You were terrified."

"Im fine. Really. Just…go back to bed…." I told him, even though the last thing I wanted him to do was go back to sleep. I just wanted to talk to somebody…I wanted to feel safe…

"Bella. Im here now. You can tell me what happened. I know you don't know me very well, but I promise I wont tell anyone. Im not going to bed until I know you feel better."

Then I realized where I was sitting. In his lap. With his arms around me.

_Oh. Shit._

"uhh…how much did you hear?"

"A lot. Something about James, and he was hurting you and…" He stopped talking. He almost looked, upset..? "and you were yelling 'stop! Stop!'….and-an-and…." he stopped again, and looked up at me. "I couldn't let anyone hurt you. I know I just met you, and it was just a dream, but I-I just…I wanted to keep you safe. I couldn't stand hearing you that upset. Even if it was just a dream…"

I was speechless. Nobody had said anything like that to me in forever. Nobody cared enough to. And the weirdest part? I felt the exact same way about him.

**Edward POV**

Bella wasn't talking. I had just told her how I felt about her and she wasn't saying anything.

_Shit Mason! You shouldn't have told her anything! You have a job to do. You cant fall for her! NO! You cant let yourself. No matter how beautiful she is. Or how amazing her eyes or how full and perfect her lips are…Stop it, Mason! Stop! You have to kill her, remember? Besides, then she will be happier. She wanted to die anyway…_

"I uh…I feel the same way. Im really sorry if it freaks you out. But I just feel…safe. With you."

_Well. There goes any chance of me doing my job._

"Really? I-I mean….Really?"

"Yeah…. I mean, you woke me up, and I wasn't scared anymore. Im not scared to tell you about anything that happened. I've been scared of everyone in my life for the past 2 years, and I feel completely safe with you. I don't know how that's possible, considering on how I just met you. But I do. I feel more safe with you than I've felt with anyone in my whole life."

_Says the girl that I'm supposed to kill…_

_****UNFINISHED CHAPTER! I havent had time to finish it yet, but I figured I would put this up so you guys can see at least something (: Hope you like it! Review please!****  
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